Dundee manager Neil McCann has launched a petition to replace human officials with robots, it has emerged.
The part-time cardigan model and Declan Donnelly impersonator believes that major decisions have regularly been going against his side and that action must be taken. When questioned about the subject, McCann said: “I’m gutted. I’ve been gutted for weeks. We’re getting zero decisions and it’s hard to take. I moan about it every week and nothing changes. So I’m taking things into my own hands.”
McCann sparked into what can only be described as a major meltdown after the reporter let out a snorting laugh at McCann’s idea.
“WHY LAUGH?! You think this is funny?! Well let me tell you, it’s the future. I’ve been door to door from the Hulltoon to Lochee with my petition. I’ve got 88 signatures and I’ve still got to go around the boys. Darren is behind it. I put my idea to Big Spanish Jon, he just shook his head in agreement.”
McCann added: “Imagine if you all voted against Newton or Einstein, back in the day?! You’d all feel like twats, now! Technology is moving fast and it’ll be better than Willie f*****g Collum! I have blueprints and I’ve started a Kickstarter. All we need is £2.5 million to get up and running. Doncaster loves the idea, we just need the cash.”
“Have you not seen The Terminator?! You’ll rue the day you laughed at the robot referee! C**T!” McCann roared, proceeding to leave the room.